Effective Father Quality #7: An effective father competently disciplines his children
Hebrews 12:5-6, 9-10 “My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord, nor faint when you are reproved by Him; 6 for those whom the Lord loves He disciplines, and He scourges every son who He received…. 9 Furthermore, we had earthly fathers to discipline us, and we respected them; shall we not much rather be subject to the Father of spirits, and live? 10 For they disciplined us for a short time as seemed best to them, but He disciplines us for our good, so that we may share His holiness.”
There is no doubt that disciplining children is a very important part of fatherhood. The Scripture teaches that our Heavenly Father disciplines us and so it stands to reason that we, earthly fathers, need to play a role in disciplining our children.
In 2013 and into 2014, I wrote a series of blogs on disciplining children. Rather than, reviewing what I wrote, allow me to refer you to two sets of blog series on the subject of disciplining children. The series on How to Discipline Your Children started on Oct 10, 2013 and the series on Seven Qualities of an Effective Father began on May 8, 2014. Both series can be found in the blog archives.
Let me mention one thing on my heart as I write this blog.
Make sure your yes is a yes and your no is a no when it comes to directing your children. Nothing provokes a child more than having an indecisive father who keeps vacillating on his decisions and discipline.
This doesn’t mean we cannot change our minds, but, for the most part, our children should be able to trust what we say to them the first time.
For example, you tell your child that he or she cannot go a certain event. The next day, you say they can. The following hour, you prohibit them from going because they did something that displeased you. If you were my father, I would be frustrated with you and not know whether or not I could trust you at your word.
Jesus said, “But let your statement be, 'Yes, yes ' or 'No, no'; anything beyond these is of evil.” He is addressing the making of vows, but the principle is very simple. When you say yes or no, you should be good to your word without having to make a vow.
As dads, our children should have complete confidence that our words to them are trustworthy especially when it comes to discipline.
Something to think about…