Love Languages (Part Three) – Quality Time

Language #2: Quality Time          

Ephesians 5:15-16 “Therefore be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise, 16 making the most of your time, because the days are evil.”

For some, quality time is the best way of saying, “I love you”. What exactly is quality time? It differs from one person to the next and part of one’s goal should be to discover what quality time means to those significant in one’s life.

Generally speaking, quality time has to do with focus rather than proximity. It has to do with giving someone your undivided attention rather than sitting together and watching a movie no matter how good the movie happens to be.

Today’s telephones are a remarkable achievement in electronics. You can not only speak to someone half a world away, but you can see them and they can see you as you speak. It’s called ‘face time’. My grandkids use it sometimes when they call me.

When using face time, you have to be present for the conversation. You have to look at the person and focus your attention. When I am not using face time, I can carry on a conversation on the phone while doing something else. I used to see my mother talk on the phone and do dishes at the same time. I sometimes talk on the phone and open my emails simultaneously. We called that multitasking, when really it should be called being impolite. However, when I am communicating via face time, I am focused on the conversation since I can see them and they can see me. It’s face to face.

Quality time is face time. It requires focused attention. You know when you are giving it and you know when you are getting it.

I think it’s possible to have quality time while doing an activity, like hiking or exercising together. Whenever you are fully present for the one being loved, it’s quality time.

Let’s say you have a date night planned this weekend, which involves seeing a movie you both want to see. How can you make quality time out of it? Perhaps you can go get dessert afterwards and talk about the movie. Share with one another how the movie made you feel. Share which character you identified with the most. Use the movie as an entree to face time together.

The Bible speaks of redeeming the time or making the most of the time. This would be a good description of quality time. So let’s redeem the time we spend with one another.

Something to think about…